Lately I feel like I have been a real slacker, so here to make me look impressive is a paper i had to write for my graduate seminar class on personal manifestos and stuff. You really don't have to read it I just thought it would spice up my blog.

When faced with the inevitable possibility of having to proclaim something about my self and of my desires I was struck with more then modern crime scene panic. The idea that at any given moment I could not only be disproved and debunked, but also that this movement is originating from me (wither or not I believe that ‘original’ is something that can still be considered a possibility) becomes quite intimidating. I am choosing instead to make a few heartfelt, but more grounded declarations and reminisce about a movement for which I hold great personal fondness.
The first declaration: I am a NEO-DADAIST. I am tired of out dated conformity, plural concepts of disapproval, and critical nay saying. There can be so many advances in the face of chaos and laughter that it seems foolish to continue the oppression of organization and melancholy that exists today. That I can make art or run about with eggs on my head and the effect on the world is the same as clouds passing is so ideal. To be able to no longer lament a peaceful anarchy, but embrace a foolish sensual tumbling is the most that I can hope to derive from life.
The second declaration: NONE of this is TRUE. I am comfortable in this stupid setting, given parameters and deadlines. I enjoy the idea that I have someone to answer to other then myself and life is easy. Without all this prescribed structure I would not achieve all the things that I believe are possible I would only stagnate. Overall I enjoy my organization and am there for melancholy.
The third declaration: ALL of this is TRUE. While I have no genuine foundation in philosophy or rhetoric, I have come to the understanding that all life contains at least some element of contradiction. It would be impossible for me to declare myself a Neo-Dadaist if I did not also feel confined or driven by the elements that Dadaism balks. I find it is a necessity to identify that the only constant in life is change, so for whatever reasons I have to take into consideration my entire life experience and how it affects my present state of mind. I do not have the ability to predict the future so my choices in the present must reflect a retrospective view of my past and also consider possible ramifications. Unfortunately if too much time is spent dissecting the potential future based on the present choices the present will too quickly become the past. This is another lamentable situation and one that moved me to decline organization in favor of chaos.

Now that I have made a few declarations about myself, this seems an ideal time to discuss the movement that I noted earlier. In the spring of 1999 I was attending school at the California College of Arts and Crafts (this was a brief recess from my study in Detroit, where I eventually completed my degree). I had the pleasure and privilege of sharing a room with a very skilled artist from Sacramento. She made large scale pastel and charcoal drawings on neutral colored papers and would bring them home and hang them over her bed to think about. They were always lush with flesh tones and appeared very erotic, even if they did not make reference to the figure. During my time with her and her art we developed a pleasing rapport for each other.
One evening in the dirty open air studio on the far side of the small campus that overlooked the shopping complex we devised the heart of what both life and art needed to encapsulate in order to be truly satisfying. It became what we still occasionally bring up in conversation: The Sex and Death Movement. I was overcome by her coy shyness in the face of her sensual gesture toward the paper and canvas and we would talk at length about how pleasing it was as both maker and viewer. This was the sex.
It was then decided after she had been caught in the rain returning from San Francisco and some of her larger drawings had been ruined that the temporary nature of things was also very important. Neither of us were striving to be archivists and the more we observed each others work the more we came to understand how thrilling the temporal element was.
The final and most important part of our movement became its connection to living. Our art refused to exist without our lives so we were helpless not to pander to its every demand and desire. Sex was the signifier of pleasure and exuberance. We were enticed by food, color, texture, riding the bus purely for the sensation on our feet when standing. Death was the signifier of our temporal existence (though I don’t think I would have stated it that way at the time, it sounds much too contrived). It became the license to embrace the desires we had to indulge in order to achieve our art.

I still don't really have anything to say I am just procrastinating instead of working and i am damned tired. I fell asleep and that seems to be all i want to do and then it gets late and I am all wired again it is shitty. Oh well , theoretically once all the stuff i am putting off is done with I won't have this cursed monkey on my back. Maybe I'll go take a quiz.......

You Are a Drag Queen!

You are a Drag Queen.


MAC makeup, hairspray, binding your cock between your legs... Sound familar?


You are as womanly as they come, with a secret package for your for lover to unwrap.


Don't let that facial stubble at the end of the night getbyou down.


No one can tell in a dark club.

What Kind of Queen Are *You*?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

I'm a DRAG Queen HUH, I wish and dammit last time i checked I don't have the stuble except on my legs!

I'll be damned. You ARE bisexual AFTER all!

You sees "31 Flavors" as the ideal place to work.

You can get unequivocally turned on by eating Cheese 'n Crackers -

taking the little sticks from the wrapper and sliding them into the cheese.

You are definitely a sexual glutton, taking as much as you can ;)



Are *You* Bisexual? Click Here to Find Out!

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

On No I'm a glutton ho ho ho !
Stupid lusty quizzes
Dammit I want to go to bed but also finnish writing my paper at the same time i wish i coudl function in my sleep like mind reading or some shit,alright i swear I'm done and going to bed and all that shit and fuckity fuck, I'll dream my paper right on to the page in my sleep*sigh* in the year 2000.

MUST WRITE ON BLOG now I have a clean bog.