A stolen Quality Waste of Time

16 Random Things About Me

1- I recently got my first tattoo. Nothing fancy, but it needs a lot of retouching, not due to the artist, but the fact that I am a dork and picked a finickie spot to have it done. A fun fact about the tattoo is that I traded an old Schwinn cruiser to a friend to have it done.

2- Right now I have nothing in my fridge with the exception of assorted condiments, assorted alcohol, water(FROM THE TAP), sugar free grape kool aid (BRAND NAME, shocking, seriously SHOCKING), an abundance of rice milk, and a tomato that has become frozen solid due to the lack of other things in the fridge to be kept cool.

3-I keep thinking I want to do something crazy to my hair, but I just don't have the energy to follow through.

4-I will be driving VERY SLOWLY (stupid icy roads) to the airport tonight to pick up my bro and bebe as they return from a lovely trip to San Diego.

5-I inappropriately love my washer and dryer and hate my upstairs neighbors (that really could be two things, but I'll lump it together, what the hell)

6-I have an odd weather barometer, rainy days make me want to be productive, snowy days make me sleepy, and sunny days with a fresh snow fall from the night before give me excessive cabin fever. ( I will stick to the recent/current weather for my barometer commentary)

7-I have a perfectly round bruise on my upper left arm and I have no idea where it came from.

8-I found my dream moped, now I just have to figure out how to pay for it and get it here from LA, ACK!

9-I rarely hear anyone refer to someone as a "bone-head" and I wonder why that is.

10-I own all five of the N'Sync marionettes with the boxes ( I took them out to play with them so they are not mint or anything like that) Lance has always been my favorite, but his marionette is pretty creepy looking.

11-I have a delicious care package of polenta lasagna waiting for me at my dads house, I can't wait to get off work so I can go and pick it up!

12-I hate my couch and all the baggage that came with it, but I can't seem to extricate myself from either.

13-I am completely confused by people who like to make out in the Fetal Anatomy room and people who get handsy when they see the male urinary tract.

14-I spend 90% of the time that I am at home in my bed.

15-I enjoy being a woman, but would like to master peeing standing up without wacky devices for the sake of convince.

16-I really like the movie Mr. Mom.

There you have it, that took a lot longer than I expected, well anyway, if you made it this far thanks for reading and like I said do with it what you will.

-e

FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU, you fucking hipster asshole mother fucking bastard inconsiderate cock monger! I am fucking so goddamn upset with you and your goddamn shit so FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU! FUCK your stupid asshole life, your stupid fuck head douche hole friends, fuck your stupid fuck face! I am filled with bile and dread, I thought I wasn't mad, but I am, things are not ok, wounds are not healed, the sores fester and rot, so FUCK YOU!

Barfing on technology.

It might be that all I have eaten today is red vines, but as I learned they do contain wheat flour. But I am going insane; I want to barf on technology. Yet look at what I am using technology, stupid fucking irony. I want to do something I really enjoy with my life and I keep getting these pokes that ‘this’ is not it, sigh. I want to make art all fucking day long and not worry about what people think and make money and not worry about falling in a hole because I don’t have god damned health insurance. I want to work on projects with a beginning middle and end. I am so fucking sick of thinking about ropes and guns.

Blerg!

Oh and fuck money!

A massive quality waste of time…

*due to its massiveness some questions will appear to be similar or to repeat and some of them do.

1. Can you cook?

Sort of…I used to be a bit of a gourmand, but now I specialize in microwave/cereal/sandwich cuisine. I just hate washing dishes SO much.

2. What was your dream growing up?

To be Wonder Woman AND Spider Man and oddly enough an artist.

3. What talent do you wish you had?

Be able to pick up on and speak multiple languages off the top of my head.

4. Favorite place?

Mama Gallo’s of my childhood.

5. Favorite vegetable?

Avocado…wait that’s technically a fruit…Artichokes are tasty, I like lots of vegetables, brussel sprouts, asparagus, beets, parsnips…

6. What was the last book you read?

From cover to cover…Go Ask Alice

7. What zodiac sign are you?

Leo, but I feel like more of a lop then a lion…

8. Any Tattoos and/or Piercing?

Not yet, but I am bartering my way into my first tattoo.

9. Worst habit?

Allergic to the telephone.

10. Do we know each other off line?

I dunno, do we?

11. What is your favorite sport?

Hockey or Curling, but I really just like to watch.

12. Negative or Optimistic attitude?

Depends on the moment.

13. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?

I dunno…want to make out? Ok, so that’s a no…well I am pretty fucking tired so

I’d take a nap.

14. Worst thing to ever happen to you?

Having to think about what the worst thing to even happen to me is and then

thinking, it probably hasn’t happened yet, egh how morbid.

15. Tell me one weird fact about you:

For my 13^th Birthday my dad got me a stripper.

16. Do you have any pets?

Yes. My furry man cat man and Sid Fishous

17. Do you know how to do the Macarena?

Sort of, but only in that I remember seeing Dr. Evil do the Macarena in the first

Austin Powers movie way.

18. What time is it where you are now?

10:40am

19. Do you think clowns are cute or scary?

90% Scary

20. If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?

I would like to have naturally neon pinkie red hair that would change color when I

wanted to be aquamarine with purple roots and tips.

21. Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?

I think it depends on the ‘crime’, I am such a bad liar and am totally freaked out

by authority that I would probably end up being the conscience, sigh. I know I am

a total rube.

22. What color eyes do you have?

Kinda hazel green.

23. Ever been arrested?

Nope, note the fear of authority and being a self admitted bad liar.

24. What is your favorite drink?

Iced Peppermint Tea or Harvey Wallbanger

25. If you won $10,000 dollars today, what would you do with it?

Pay down my college loans.

26. What kind of bubble gum do you prefer to chew?

Peppermint and other assorted mints.

27. What’s your favorite place to hang out?

My bed.

28. Do you believe in ghosts?

“I want to believe”

29. Favorite thing to do in your spare time?

Nap/doodle/read/watch movies

30. Do you swear a lot?

FUCK yeah like a MOTHERFUCKING sailor!

31. Biggest pet peeve?

Insincerity.

32. In one word, how would you describe yourself?

Oddball.

33. Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you?

Nope, I only put stuff like this in blogs.

34. How many ducks would it take to equal the weight of an average human?

Well according to Wikipedia an average male duck weights 8 lbs. and according

to the National Center for Health Statistics, the average weight for an adult male

in the United States is: 190 lbs. So about 24 ducks.

35. Why do mice always choose to run across the room in the middle of good TV shows, and never during the commercials?

I’ve never really noticed that, I also have been fortunate enough not to have loose

mice in my TV room.

36. Why do you only slip and fall when carrying fragile things?

Murphy’s Law…if you don’t know what I am talking about just Google it.

37. Why does the buttered side of the toast always land on the floor?

Because I apply so much butter to my toast that it is on both sides of the bread.

38. Why do you only go out for spaghetti while wearing a white shirt?

This is not true I do not wear white so I have not noticed this; however on any

given day there is a 98% chance that regardless of the color of my shirt that I

WILL get food on it, that is my curse.

39. Why doesn't cable TV show anything good?

It does, just not when I am watching, one of the greatest things ever…DVR!

40. Why do you only crave fast food AFTER the restaurant has closed for the night?

I don’t. I crave all things to be 24 hours instead of this prescribed banality of

daytime life!

41. Why do some people type "cool" as "kewl?"

Cuz it’s kewl to do.

42. Why are you reading this page?

Because I am writing on this page, duh!

43. Why are baby predators cuter than baby harmless creatures?

Aww imagine a little a baby Predator, now that is pretty fucking cute, plus most

non predator babies are all pink and squidgy and take a little while to get cute, but

a lot of baby predators (I can think of at the moment anyway) come out of eggs

and they are ready to rock’n’roll.

44. Why can I never find my book after setting it down for twenty seconds?

Because my mind is spinning and I am thinking about a million other things, oh

and because I work in a library, duh! What book was it?

45. Why is there no good and cheap Macintosh software readily available?

Because Steve Jobs is a big putzface and other things related to that.

46. Why wasn't I born rich?

Good question.

47. Why is Baywatch so popular, if nobody I know ever watches it?

I used to watch it and I hear it is huge in Europe. My friend and I would both

watch it in our bathtubs and talk on the phone about it at the same time, woah.

48. What’s your full name?

Nunayo Fuckinbusness

49. How old are you?

30, argh!

50. What’s your star sign?

Leo, see I told you some questions repeat!

60. What’s your hair color?

Aburn.

61. What’s your eye color?

Hazel Green.

62. Have you ever been in love?

Yes.

63. Who was your first crush?

Michael J. Fox, there must be something about tiny men…

64. How long was your last relationship?

6 years give or take a few disasters.

65. Ever cried over a girl/boy?

Yes.

66. Are you missing someone?

Yes.

67. Do you drink?

Yes.

68. Ever been so drunk you don’t remember all the night?

Yes.

69. Ever tried drugs?

Yes, but nothing all that hard.

70. What scares you?

A lot of things.

71. Do you believe in fate?

Yes, however I feel like maybe I shouldn’t.

72. Do you believe in karma?

Yes, but it is my actions this moment that matter most.

73. Who did you last speak on the phone to?

My brother.

74. What’s your favorite film?

Too many to pick one.

75. What film did you last watch?

Big Trouble in Little China

76. What books are you reading?

Too many.

77. Dogs or cats?

Cats (furry man cat love), but dogs are nice too, they just make me sneeze.

78. Night or day?

Night.

79. What can’t you live without?

Oxygen.

80. Any piercing?

Not yet.

81. Any tattoos?

Not at the moment.

82. What attracts you to the opposite sex?

Mostly the same thing that attracts me to the same sex.

83. Who did you last kiss?

My furry man cat man.

84. What’s the last song you listened too?

KRCL’s Saturday Sage meditation for world peace.

85. What turns you off?

Selfishness, insincerity, and neglect

86. What did you want to be as a kid?

Wonder Woman, Spider Man, an Artists ,and a Teacher

87. Do you like cheese?

No…I LOVE IT!

88. Have you ever smoked heroin?

Nope.

89. Do you own a gun?

A water gun and a potato gun.

90. Do you like listening to Christmas music?

For a few days during Christmas only.

91. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments?

Always and I sweat when I am nervous.

92. What do you think of hot dogs?

A good one is good, a bad one is not worth it.

93. Favorite Christmas song?

Anything from the A side of a Johnny Mathis Christmas

94. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?

Ice cold peppermint tea or creamy hot coco

95. Can you do push ups?

In the swimming pool.

96. What's your favorite piece of jewelry?

As in I wear it the most, my watch, otherwise the necklace that was my great

aunts.

97. Favorite hobby?

Day dreaming.

98. Secret weapon to get the opposite sex?

Not aware I had one…

99. Do you have A.D.D.?

Nope, I’m just tired.

100. What one trait do you hate about yourself?

Neurosis.

101. Middle Name?

Elizabeth.

102. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment.

1. I am so bored!

2. I wish I had my water bottle.

3. I’d like to take a shower.

103. Name 3 things you bought yesterday?

1. B-I-N-G-O Boards

2. Soda and Chips

3. A support ribbon

104. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink?

1. Water

2. Milk

3. Orange Bang

105. Current worry right now?

Money.

106. Current hate?

Hate crimes.

107. Favorite place to be?

Napping.

108. How did you bring in the New Year?

A Merlot’s house, it was a good time.

109. Where would you like to go?

All over the world.

110. Name three people who will complete this and return?

NO!

111. Do you own flip flops?

Yes multiple pairs.

112. What shirt are you wearing?

A turquoise t-shirt that says ‘autumn is spring in rio’

113. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets?

When I was younger I always wanted some, but really my ideal sheets are nice

crisp cotton percale.

114. Can you whistle?

Yes.

115. Favorite color?

ORANGE!

116. Would you be a pirate?

Yes I suppose, but more for the fashion than the lifestyle.

117. What songs do you sing in the shower?

Flower by Liz Phair, Leggy Blonde by Flight of the Concords, various songs from

A Chorus Line, and other general made up stuff

118. Favorite girl's name?

Eunice

119. Favorite boy's name?

Linus

120. What's in your pocket right now?

Lint.

121. Last thing that made you laugh?

Ruby Ridge.

122. Best bed sheets as a child?

Kliban Cat Bedsheets.

123. Worst injury you've ever had?

Falling in a hole on Halloween.

124. Do you love where you live?

Depends on the day.

125. How many TVs do you have in your house?

2 and 1/2

126. Who is your loudest friend?

Also depends on the day.

127. How many dogs do you have?

None, they make me sneeze.

128. Does someone have a crush on you?

I don’t know.

129. What is your favorite book?

Force Majure by Bruce Wagner

130. What is your favorite candy?

DARK Chocolate

131. Do you know all the words to the Fresh Prince theme song?

Pretty much, I’d have to hear the song to sing it.

132. What song do you want played at your funeral?

An all accordion and ukulele version of RAVEL’s BOLERO

133. What were you doing 12 AM last night?

In bed watching Dexter/falling asleep.

134. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up?

Why do I have to go to work on a Saturday.

135. What time is it?

12:41pm

136. Number of candles that appeared on your last birthday cake?

Well there was one candle on my birthday sorbet last weekend.

137. How much do you love your job on a scale of 0-5.

Some days are a 2 some days are a 4.

138. Home County?

Ewww S A

139. Current Relationship Status?

Table for one.

140. Favourite food?

Sushi and Sandwich

141. Been to Africa?

Not yet.

142. Been to Camden?

Not yet.

143. Loved somebody so much it made you cry?

Yeah.

144. Been in a car accident?

A few, but nothing serious. ‘knock wood’

145. Croutons or bacon bits?

I tend to dislike croutons and am not huge about bacon either; however I’d choose

bacon bits for the nostalgia, my mom loved to cook with them when I was a kid.

146. Sprite or 7UP?

7UP, Cherry 7UP

147. Favourite Holiday?

Any that provide me with a day off.

148. Favourite day of the week?

One that I can sleep in on.

149. Favourite Toothpaste?

Glisten, ‘Who left the cap off my fucking Glisten’, but seriously…Tom’s of

Maine Peppermint.

150. Favourite Restaurant?

The service has been crap lately, but I love the Mediterranean salad at the Oasis

and I really miss the breakfast sandwich with sausage from Orbit.

151. Favourite Flowers?

I like green plants, but I am fond of tulips and other bright blossoms.

152. Favourite beverage?

Iced peppermeint tea, water with lemon, and harvey wallbangers.

153. Favourite sport to watch?

Hockey, Curling, or Diving.

154. Preferred type of ice cream?

Canadian Vanilla and Burnt Almond Fudge

155. Favourite Sesame Street Character?

Grover J

156. Favourite Fast Food Restaurant?

Humm, I like it cheap and greasy, but I can’t think of a favorite.

157. When was your last hospital visit?

I was in the emergency room this weekend with my friend. Shell fell, but nothing

is broken, thank goodness.

158. What colour is your bedroom carpet?

Kinda gross neutral tan color with brown flecks, blah.

159. How many times did you fail your driver's test?

None that I can remember, I’m pretty sure that I passed the first time around.

160. Who is the last person you read an opinion by before this?

Whoever I stole this from on the internet.

161. Have you ever been convicted of a crime?

Nope, authority makes me antsy.

162. Which single store would you choose to max out your credit card?

Ikea, did you know that they make houses, yup Ikea.

163. What do you do most often when you are bored?

Watch movies; take naps with my furry man cat.

164. Most annoying thing people ask me?

“Where is the restroom?” and “How do I get to the 3^rd floor?” are tied for first

place.

165. Bedtime?

12-1ish or 6pm, ha

166. Favourite TV show?

I like a few, mostly I like anything I can watch without commercials so I like stuff

that is out on DVD or that I have on DVR so I can skip the commercials.

167. Last person you went out to dinner with?

Tim and Merlot at the Dee’s after the hospital emergency room, I needed to do

some recovery eating.

168. Last Movie you saw?

In the theatre…KungFu Panda, on the couch…Hot Fuzz

169. What time is it?

10:11am

Ponderance:

Is it better to get caught taking the expensive work camera home to use for a Suicide Girls photo shoot or to get caught using the expensive work camera in your office for a Suicide Girls photo shoot?

Ponderances...

1. If you start eating an ice cream cone in the bathroom you have to finish eating that ice cream in the bathroom.

2. Vegan peanut butter cookies are so good because they are mostly peanut butter.

Double Lives & Lacking Cunt


Here it is defined by Merriam Webster…
duality

Main Entry: du·al·i·ty Pronunciation: dü-'a-l&-tE also dyü-Function: nounInflected Form(s): plural -ties: DUALISM 2; also : DICHOTOMY

dualism

Main Entry: du·al·ism Pronunciation: 'dü-&-"li-z&m also 'dyü-Function: noun1 : a theory that considers reality to consist of two irreducible elements or modes2 : the quality or state of being dual or of having a dual nature3 a : a doctrine that the universe is under the dominion of two opposing principles one of which is good and the other evil b : a view of human beings as constituted of two irreducible elements (as matter and spirit)
Double Life--having a dual character or nature. I bring this up all of the time. I am split an imperfect person demanding perfect balance, my two halves in a state or mutual difference and defiance. I get all wrapped around perfection and questions that only need to be answered once and in that answer definitively.

This is why I collect magic eight balls, read horoscopes each day, and document my throwing of runes. This is the research into myself the outside answers that I put my faith in, to keep me safe from a misstep of my own design. Nothing has been right yet, I guess I’ll let myself know when a more accurate database comes online…

---------

Here it is defined by Merriam Webster…
cunt

Main Entry: cunt Pronunciation: 'k&ntFunction: nounEtymology: Middle English cunte; akin to Middle Low German kunte female pudenda1 usually obscene : the female genital organs; also : sexual intercourse with a woman2 usually disparaging & obscene
I am all for the reclamation of this word! One of the main reasons for that is as I sit here reminiscing about this, that, and the other a few moments in my life come to mind when I needed a phrase like this. “She’ll never do that, she hasn’t got the balls!” –Well no shit she doesn’t have the balls. Try, “She’ll never do that, she hasn’t got the cunt!”

Viola…there it is the truth, she may have a vagina, even on occasion a pussy, but that girl lacks CUNT. Brisk, powerful, potentially offensive, just crude enough that it feels proud! Why you may ask yourself am I hung up on this or even really thinking about this? Well other then becoming a recent morning person and choosing to save the world from my insanity a bus rider as well, I have had a bit more time on my hands to zone out and think. Just look at what ingenious things that time is producing *ooh, ahh, fire works bursting over head*

So a few years ago I had a class with this person (I will attempt to keep them nameless and mildly hard to identify) who made giant crotch art. No foolin’ big live-in vaginas. Now I am all for a stance of ‘to each their own’ and ‘it takes different strokes to move the world’ especially when it comes to art, but this person was insistent that in no way whatsoever were any of these forms references or reproductions of big spacious crotches. For this reason and other more personal and petty reasons I was driven to the true edge of insanity by the thought of this person and their vaginatastic creations.

I needed a way to describe my intensified feelings of sheer distaste for this vagina wielding counterpart. I may not always show it or choose to recognize it; hence the previously mentioned duality, but I have got CUNT! I’ve got it up to here and then some (making the moderately universal height mark above my head) and I’m really trying to access its powers.

So I say take your cuntless foolery back to where it came from you filthy hipster/scenester! I wasn’t the only one that walked into your cool barren wind tunnel crotch and thought ‘…hummm VAGINA!”

I mention a live journal in here several times, but I have to let you know that my active neglect has caused it to become a dead account, not sure what it says anymore, oh well.

*amended: my live journal has been found a re-activated, it is wild_palms if you are so inclined.

Back and Blogger than ever!

It's carzy the things you find in the ether, it's like a huge messy closet.